Cole-o-ween: Day 8

As you know by now, Cole of vitagraph, american has hand picked 10 films for me to watch and blog about for a whole week in a little somethin’ somethin’ he calls Queue De Grâce.

Well, here at Spectacular Optical we take these obligations seriously and do our damnedest to get the job done…even if it takes 10 days just to get to day 8! (I said we’d get it done not get it done right.)

Today is one hell of a treat…it’s Nathan Schiff‘s super 8 sci-fi/horror, mini-masterpiece: WEASELS RIP MY FLESH (1979)!

Now some may say Cole is somewhat of a film snob (and by “some” I mean “me”) but WRMF is here to lay those slanderous rumors to rest once and for all! I have to admit that I was shocked (and pleasantly surprised) to see a film with such questionable quality as part of the proceedings.

This amazing piece of cinematic gold is the type of movie I spent my 20s devouring on a regular basis with blatant disregard for my VCR heads….so it was a real joy to revisit a grade-Z labor of love.

Just check out the title card and the opening credits:

Damn…it doesn’t get much better than that…or does it? The answer to that question is, “Yes!” Just like SHOWGIRLS (1995), every minute of this movie is somehow more awesome than the one before it.

WRMF is probably the most ambitious movie ever written, produced, and directed by a 16 year old…ever. Seriously, let’s see what you have to show for your 16th year on this planet. Sorry, but a crappy rendering of the cover to Mercyful Fate’s “Nuns Have No Fun” EP pales in comparison to Mr. Schiff’s 1st feature film. (I know that sounds like a weird example, but that was one of my major accomplishments in 1988.)

The movie begins with a some Ed Wood Jr. inspired narration over a tracking shot of beautiful Baldwin Harbor, Long Island…then the story jumps to an unexplained double homicide in some crappy apartment and then we’re transported to Venus (yes, the planet) to get the origin of the mysterious radioactive substance that will lead to all the flesh ripping weasels that were promised to us.

This space ooze is all part of the evil Dr. Sendam’s (Fred Borges) plan for immortality, world domination, and whatever else his fevered, genius brain can think up! Thankfully, the two no nonsense cops on the case are ready to risk life and limb to save the world from mad scientists, mutated weasels and human-weasel hybrid monstrosities!

And speaking of monsters…check these bad boys out:

Rob Bottin, eat your heart out!

So far WRMF has been the most fun to watch…it was filled with so many truly horrible performances, janky special effects, and amateurish direction that I couldn’t take my eyes off it and found myself rewinding it so often that it took me much longer than the hour and 3 minute run time to finish it.

So, with all that being said here’s the breakdown…

Things I liked:

  • All of the amazing miniatures
  • The fitted sheet
  • Every performance
  • The costuming
  • Monster smack-down
  • The shark
  • And the special effects of course

Things I disliked:

  • Absolutely nothing…duh

Be sure to drop in for day 9 ’cause Michael Caine is stopping by to lend Spectacular Optical a hand!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: